College days

Those  are the days, I see through the haze,
Of the time gone by, With my vintage eye,
Lovely friends and friendship too,
Feelings of a myriad hue,
Days of arguments and fights,
Of all the tiny wrongs and rights,
Days of vast leisure and play,
Feeling full of hapiness and gay,
Of time spent in wonderous talk,
Around the campus on a serene walk,
Of the many tests and night-outs,
Followed by disappointed shouts,
The scratchy movies in the auditorium,
The audio punishing the ear drum,
Waiting for the posty to come,
What tidings does he brings from home ?
Of sickness and home-sickness too,
Only friends to take care of you,
The warden in his haughty march,
Causing a naughty throat to parch,
The cold winter and the hot days,
Withering dryness of desert ways,
Does you eye fill up with tears,
Longing for those wonderful years ?

The obnoxious practice of bell-curve fitting

Come appraisal time, there is one term that is on everyone's lips. A hated term that raises hackles. A term that conjures up the worst nightmares. It is the "bell-curve fitting". For no fault of its, the bell curve has come to be associated with a practice that employees of most corporates have come to despise.

From a statistical perspective, the bell curve is a frequency distribution curve. It shows the frequency of the measured variable for different values of the variable. It also known as the Gaussian or Normal distribution, the latter nomenclature being used in Statistics more frequently. The distribution is shaped like a bell and hence the name. A bell curve is fully defined by two parameters - the mean and standard deviation (SD). It is used widely in quality control. For any set of data, it is always possible to calculate the mean and SD. But that does not necessarily mean the data itself is normally distributed. The data must be tested for normality. There are various tests that can be used. The variable must be a continuous variable i.e., it must be able to take any value in a given interval. Typical variables are height, weight, age etc. This is about the bell curve.

Where would the bell curve apply ? If in a company there are 1000 Sales representatives and each representative has a sales target of Rs. 100,000, then the actual sales figures could reasonably be expected to lie in a bell curve. However, this needs to be confirmed with a test for normality. If confirmed, the data could be plotted as a bell curve. The performance of the Sales Reps could be gauged from the plot. The Average performers would be bunched around the mean. To the right would lie the Stars and to the left, the Laggards. The Average performers would be the largest in number. The other two categories would be less and, ideally, equal. One could have 5 categories instead of 3. The company could decide how to split the categories and the percentage of people that should be in each category could be arrived at from the graph.

The trouble starts when this innocuous curve is applied to the performance of employees. An employee typically has a number of key performance parameters or KPP. These could be revenue, profit/project margin, attrition, value addition etc. Each has its own unit of measurement. Revenue and value addition are measured in currency - Rupees, Dollars, Euro etc. Margin and attrition are measured in percentage. Each KPP target is given a weightage in percentage such that the sum of all weightages is 100%. An employee's performance is measured by scoring the employee for each KPP target on a scale of, say, 1 to 10, with 1 being the lowest and 10 the highest. A weighted average is determined and this is the overall score of the employee. The scores for all employees are similarly calculated and plotted. A bell curve is applied or rather, forced on the data. Stars, Average performers and Laggards are determined. All this seems very logical.

But let us look at the hidden facts.

1. What is plotted is the score of the employee. This is just a number and there is nothing normal about it.
2. The score is calculated from a number of numbers and their weightages. Nothing normal here.
3. No test is carried out to check for normality.
4. The score includes the bias of the appraiser. One appraiser may score an average of 9 for a group and another may score 7 for the same group. One is lenient and the other is more stringent.
5. The bands are split arbitrarily. There is no logic in saying a team of 100 has 20 Laggards. How is this determined ? This  percentage is applied across the company with no rhyme or reason.
6. There is a vague and opaque process called normalisation that is supposed to take care of the appraiser bias. How this works is a mystery.
7. Corporates have a delightful way of selling this and other such practices to employees. They employ a consulting firm that comes up with such wonderful ideas. These are "best practices across the industry","industry standard practices", "modern methods of evaluation" etc. If it does not work, they quietly dump it for another system. No apologies, no regrets. And if at all anyone is to be blamed, it is the consulting firm. Sweet, isn't it ? And don't be shocked if the company goes back to the same consulting firm for the next set of "industry bench-marked practices". 😠
8. And the best piece of cake ? Ask the HR what the bell curve is and chances are they will not know !😁😁😁

So what is done, in effect, is that the bell curve is forced on data that does not fit the bell curve. Its like wearing a shoe on the head - incongruous and painful. But there is something to cover the head, so why bother if it doesn't fit !👻👻👻
But the consequences could be bad for employees. Laggards would get less or no bonus payout. Average people would get paid but less than the Stars. Career growth would also be adversely affected.
But then who cares ?

Note :

1. The term Laggard is used only for purposes of illustration and nothing derogatory is implied.
2. The word "normal" used here is in the context of the Normal distribution.
3. The terms used could vary from company to company.
4. The method of bell curve fitting and scoring could also vary but the practice would be similar.

The corporate tree

A company is like a tree and employees are like monkeys. A few monkeys get together and plant a seed. A small plant comes to life. Then it grows into a tree. Soon monkeys from far and near get on to the tree and find a comfortable perch for themselves. The monkeys also try to climb up higher. As the tree grows bigger and taller, the monkeys also go higher just by virtue of being there. A few monkeys jump off and climb other trees. Over a period of time thue rate of growth of the tree slows down. The growth of the monkeys also tapers off. Now the monkeys have to look for places in higher branches. But by now the branches are crowded. The monkeys stagnate. Occassionally a monkey happens to jump off and this provides an opportunity for another to rise up but sometimes the remaining monkeys adjust themselves in such a way that they occupy all the space on the branch and no other monkey can move there.
The monkeys are only place-holders. You may replace them with donkeys, buffaloes, lions, foxes etc. Your imagination is the limit.
Now sit back, close your eyes, relax and think of the variety of wildlife in your organisation. It is a great stress reliever !
😃😃😃 

A mosquito in your bonnet

It is a lost war. Driving away a mosquito. Just one can drive you crazy
Many are a menace. Even when a mosquito is not infecting you, it is working hard to annoy you.
I have had my share of run-ins with them. As I sit back in my chair on a lazy Sunday evening to message my friends, the mosquito sets her sights on me. I suppose I am a big juicy target. Five minutes is all I get before the attack begins. A bite on the legs. I move them. One on the elbow. I shake my arm. A bite on my neck. I drive it away with my hand. Soon I am shaking different parts of my body to her biting rythm. It is a dance, no less. This happens semi-consciously if you are a veteran. Suddenly my hand slaps my neck. One is dead. She had inserted her prombosis too far into me and was unable to escape. I wipe my hand in satisfaction. But the victory is shortlived. Another one takes her place. The whole exercise repeats. Sometimes she will buzz near my ears, driving me crazy.  So I am doing two jobs at one time. One is whatever I am doing. The other is keeping the bites to the minimum. I have found that mosquito repellent creams, mats etc. are no good, notwithstanding all the wonderful advertisements. But other people tell me they are quite effective. Perhaps the mosquitoes in my area are a toughened variety. The only effective defence, I have found, is the electric bat. This bat, a cross between a tennis and a badminton racquet, literally shocks the mosquito to death. The light and sound are a bonus, perhaps even satisfying.

Often I have taken a mosquito as a passenger in my car. It gets in uninvited when I open the door to get in. The number depends on how long the door was open. If I happen to leave a window open overnight, the entire colony would be inside the next morning. Driving under these conditions can be challenging. I get bitten all over. I can use only one hand in defence. The legs cannot be shaken, much less moved. Of course I have to concentrate on the road. Opening all the windows drives out all the mosquitoes but a few. Now the fun starts. The mosquito goes around buzzing. It reaches the open window and changes direction. Back it comes inside. How it senses the boundary between the car and the outside amazes me. But everytime it unerringly turns back. I am sure border issues would be resolved if  mosquitoes were to police the borders. I decide the mosquito needs some help. So I try and push it out with my hand or try to blow it out. I try this when I am waiting at a signal. Other drivers give me a strange look. I guess they think I am crazy to be waving my hands and blowing at nothing. I also run the risk of women taking umbrage at my actions. Victory at last. The mosquito flies away. I immediately raise my windows. But before the glass is fully raised, the chap comes in again. He has no intention of leaving my car. After many more tries (at signals only as it would be dangerous to do all this while driving), I finally manage to drive him out.
Then I reflect. I had picked him up at home and dropped him off a few kilometres away. Will he find his way back ? Will he find new friends or a new family ? Will he remain alone for the rest of his life ? Will he survive ? My concern for him grows as the distance from him increases. If only there were some means of communicating with the mosquito, I would learn so much from him.